An Easier, Softer Prettier Big Book?

No Pretty Answer

If we were to re-edit-not rewrite – the Big Book for use in a classroom one of the first things a professional editor in the educational textbook publishing business would do – without changing a single word of the author’s writing – would be to add and subtitles to chapters – with headings and subheading within those chapter s that tell the student what each specific topic and sets of ideas were being covered at many given moment. Then it would all then be indexed.

It makes textbooks look “purdy” – and it allows for easy referencing when looking something up “on the fly”. It is for the convenience of the student and unattractive books do not sell well in the textbook publishing and marketing business. It can be a very competitive field and when done right produces levels of profit for publishing houses and authors that would stagger you and me before a shot of straight Yukon Jack could reach our livers.

Apparently the Big Book co-authors were not interested in doing things for our convenience.

Alcoholics interested in learning how they achieved victory over alcoholism had to take the whole kit and caboodle without getting any cherry-picking privileges. I suppose we are lucky that they used Chapter Titles at all!

They thought that they had a corner on the market – since their book would contain a solution for alcoholism – a solution which has existed since the beginning of mankind but had not been packaged and sold to specific target – the real alcoholic. They felt that they were the first to “wholesale” the solution they had found in the form of a book written by alcoholics for alcoholics. It is not a “How To” work but a “How We Did It” volume.

There is nothing in recorded AA history which suggests that this was any sort of group conscious effort – but if it was, it was nothing short of pure genius. If not pure human genius then that leaves only one other explanation: Pure Divinity – God Genius – or laziness – whatever.

In the “Amends” section of the Big Book – which runs from page 76 through page 84, each “type” of amends is discussed separately. There are six sections in all. It might look like this if we did get it to an editor:

ANY LENGTH FOR VICTORY
Setting Right Past Mistakes

General amends guidelines ……….. 76
What to say – Not say ……. 76, 77
Expectations……………….77

Financial Harms………………….…78

Criminal Offenses………………..…78, 79, 80

Domestic Troubles ………………….80
Infidelity …………………………………81
Reparation.………………………………82

Family Relationships……………. 82, 83

Ninth Step Promises.……………..83, 84

Are you beginning to get the idea that maybe the last person you heard say, “The Big Book is poorly written” just maybe had not ever seriously read it – or used it as it was designed – as a textbook? Sure lots of people read the stories in the back of the book. Sure they periodically look up a quote here and there. They might even attend Big Book meetings which are more akin to the “Story Hour” at the local library where my kids go to hear a local author perform a reading of his latest Young Reader story.

Now all we have to do it hire an illustrator and we are all set to change the world AGAIN – like the co-authors did. What I’ve written above isn’t creative at all – no snappy heads or subheads but you get the idea – and not one word of the Big Book is any different because no one has injected their ego into it. BUT it would be a very different book – one that I may NEVER have used properly and instead – like any impatient alcoholic would, thumb through it looking for immediate fixes for immediate problems WITHOUT TAKING THE STEPS.

There is nothing good to be gained by EVER making the Big Book easier to use. Movements like AWOL and institutions like Hazelton have tried and tried.

Wally P came up with marketing the “Back-To-Basics” material and while it has helped many people recover – even THAT gets abused. People write and sell books and “Guides” on “HOW TO TAKE THE STEPS” – and they may as well just piss into a stiff wind.

If it isn’t one-alcoholic-talking-to another and unless the result is a spiritual awakening that allows us to be of maximum service to God and our fellows, then it is ALL BULLSHIT. If the result is to bolster abstinence – it’s bullshit. If the result is serenity – it’s bullshit. If the result is acceptance – it’s DOUBLE bullshit.

It isn’t only WHAT they did – it is just as much HOW they did it. So many of us want to do IT – we want to have a spiritual awakening – but don’t want to undertake the drastic and extreme METHOD proposed.

Say man
Hey baby
I saw your wife the other day
Yeah
Yeah, an’ she’s ug-leeee
Yeah, she’s ugly
But she sure can cook, baby
Yeah, alright

Jimmy Soul “If You Wanna Be Happy”

My Big Book COOKS Baby! You may think it’s ugleeeee – but we eat good around here — and that is a beautiful thing!

Peace,

Danny S

An Easier, Softer Prettier Big Book?

No Pretty Answer

If we were to re-edit-not rewrite – the Big Book for use in a classroom one of the first things a professional editor in the educational textbook publishing business would do – without changing a single word of the author’s writing – would be to add and subtitles to chapters – with headings and subheading within those chapter s that tell the student what each specific topic and sets of ideas were being covered at many given moment. Then it would all then be indexed.

It makes textbooks look “purdy” – and it allows for easy referencing when looking something up “on the fly”. It is for the convenience of the student and unattractive books do not sell well in the textbook publishing and marketing business. It can be a very competitive field and when done right produces levels of profit for publishing houses and authors that would stagger you and me before a shot of straight Yukon Jack could reach our livers.

Apparently the Big Book co-authors were not interested in doing things for our convenience.

Alcoholics interested in learning how they achieved victory over alcoholism had to take the whole kit and caboodle without getting any cherry-picking privileges. I suppose we are lucky that they used Chapter Titles at all!

They thought that they had a corner on the market – since their book would contain a solution for alcoholism – a solution which has existed since the beginning of mankind but had not been packaged and sold to specific target – the real alcoholic. They felt that they were the first to “wholesale” the solution they had found in the form of a book written by alcoholics for alcoholics. It is not a “How To” work but a “How We Did It” volume.

There is nothing in recorded AA history which suggests that this was any sort of group conscious effort – but if it was, it was nothing short of pure genius. If not pure human genius then that leaves only one other explanation: Pure Divinity – God Genius – or laziness – whatever.

In the “Amends” section of the Big Book – which runs from page 76 through page 84, each “type” of amends is discussed separately. There are six sections in all. It might look like this if we did get it to an editor:

ANY LENGTH FOR VICTORY
Setting Right Past Mistakes

General amends guidelines ……….. 76
What to say – Not say ……. 76, 77
Expectations……………….77

Financial Harms………………….…78

Criminal Offenses………………..…78, 79, 80

Domestic Troubles ………………….80
Infidelity …………………………………81
Reparation.………………………………82

Family Relationships……………. 82, 83

Ninth Step Promises.……………..83, 84

Are you beginning to get the idea that maybe the last person you heard say, “The Big Book is poorly written” just maybe had not ever seriously read it – or used it as it was designed – as a textbook? Sure lots of people read the stories in the back of the book. Sure they periodically look up a quote here and there. They might even attend Big Book meetings which are more akin to the “Story Hour” at the local library where my kids go to hear a local author perform a reading of his latest Young Reader story.

Now all we have to do it hire an illustrator and we are all set to change the world AGAIN – like the co-authors did. What I’ve written above isn’t creative at all – no snappy heads or subheads but you get the idea – and not one word of the Big Book is any different because no one has injected their ego into it. BUT it would be a very different book – one that I may NEVER have used properly and instead – like any impatient alcoholic would, thumb through it looking for immediate fixes for immediate problems WITHOUT TAKING THE STEPS.

There is nothing good to be gained by EVER making the Big Book easier to use. Movements like AWOL and institutions like Hazelton have tried and tried.

Wally P came up with marketing the “Back-To-Basics” material and while it has helped many people recover – even THAT gets abused. People write and sell books and “Guides” on “HOW TO TAKE THE STEPS” – and they may as well just piss into a stiff wind.

If it isn’t one-alcoholic-talking-to another and unless the result is a spiritual awakening that allows us to be of maximum service to God and our fellows, then it is ALL BULLSHIT. If the result is to bolster abstinence – it’s bullshit. If the result is serenity – it’s bullshit. If the result is acceptance – it’s DOUBLE bullshit.

It isn’t only WHAT they did – it is just as much HOW they did it. So many of us want to do IT – we want to have a spiritual awakening – but don’t want to undertake the drastic and extreme METHOD proposed.

Say man
Hey baby
I saw your wife the other day
Yeah
Yeah, an’ she’s ug-leeee
Yeah, she’s ugly
But she sure can cook, baby
Yeah, alright

Jimmy Soul “If You Wanna Be Happy”

My Big Book COOKS Baby! You may think it’s ugleeeee – but we eat good around here — and that is a beautiful thing!

Peace,

Danny S

Let This Cat Out!

I’m letting you in on a little secret. It shouldn’t be a secret – but it is. To let this out of the bag means that we would have expose ourselves and whether or not we are dead weights in this Fellowship or not.

How would you like to have those haunting character defects removed? You know you would! Well, I have an answer to that. Go work with another alcoholic – not just ANY work – but THE work.

I am not taking about buying a newcomer a chicken sandwich and a cup of coffee – or driving him to a meeting – or picking him up from the courthouse. That’s not what the co-founder tell us to do – you lazy AA dead-weight! I mean perform your work well – the REAL work – the work described in the Chapter “Working With Others” - and do what we are supposed to be trained and have experienced ourselves in order to do – as passed on to us.

Take him through the Twelve Steps!

Look, I have my share of defects – that much I guarantee – but I know serenity. I know courage. I know what it is to have that elusive happiness, joyousness and freedom. But I have never had to tell a protogee, “Excuse me for a moment – we will get back to this step after I call my sponsor before I drink.” It just never happens.

Do you know why? Because character defects have NEVER cropped up when I was taking another man through the steps. NEVER EVER! The more I am working with others in this way – the further I get away from these. It is the ONLY way I know of to be free. And it also happens to be the only real purpose of the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.

I know – you thought it was to stop drinking. Well, “Sooprize Sooprize Sooprize Sargent Carter!”

Being a good Samaritan never has never removed my defects – only to the extent that I can be useful – never to the extent that I can claim any virtue for myself – have they ever gone away.

We even have the seventh Step Prayer that qualifies WHICH defects of character I can expect to be removed: “defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows.” Get it?

The rest I can sit an suffer with – until the next sick, puking alcoholic is in front of me and we go to work. You I and both know people who can’t understand why it is that they STILL have all these character defects haunting them around the clock.

The answer to them is simple: They haven’t got a sick and suffering alcoholic to take through the twelve steps. Some folks NEVER do that!

They want to “do service” - they want to “not hurt anybody” – they want to “be a powerful example” – they want to “just show up” and fantasize that THAT’S how they help others – and whatever else they can do EXCEPT take another alkie through the steps. They are missing a great deal.

They still suffer with their defects too. No one told them.

Our character defects aren’t removed so we can feel good – so we can get spiritual – so we can “not drink”. PUHLEEZE! Our defects are removed to the extent that we use our new selves and free states of being for the benefit of God’s work and helping others. Get anything else out of your self-centered greedy little mind.

It’s very simple – the more we work with others – the less our character defects “Crop up” If I want less “Cropping” – then I do more working.

Are you already doing this? Beautiful! You know what it’s like to have your character defects removed – how to remain humble enough to live with the ones that crop up and you are NOT a dead weight in a Fellowship of dead-weights.

You are my AA Hero and I thank you for being on the Broad Highway with us.

Peace,

Danny S

Group Stagnation

I was “conversing” with one of my friends down in Queensland, Australia involved in the Fellowship and we went back and forth with some ideas on growing a Primary Purpose Group once the group has been going a while (It’s spreading!) and some of the hurdles we encounter along the way.

Since I just got back from FOTS in Boston to find that out little cave on the Peninsula of Doom needs some TLC due to the high winds while I was gone; I thought I would take a day off and just share that communication with you – since this would apply to ANY group, not just a “Primary Purpose” format group. I’ll be trying to put the house back together most of today.

***********************************************************************************
Sorry for the delayed response. I just have LOTS of stuff to do – but you have been on my mind. I am finally sitting down to offer a reply. Don’t know if I’ll be on target or not but maybe look at the focus of your group activities. Is it to study the Big Book (just one part of helping alcoholics) or is it the whole kit and caboodle of “Primary Purpose”.

Even groups that gather solely to study yet have less trench activity than they should, might want to incorporate more Twelve Stepping for individuals into their “system”.

Maybe that’s your situation. I think it’s common. One day a year or two ago I was feeling like crap for several days and didn’t know why. I called Cliff B in Dallas up and told him about it.

He said, “When was the last time you sat down with a new guy to do the work?”

“I just heard a fifth step two weeks ago, Cliff . . . . and I have an appointment to start with a new prospect this coming Monday.“ I said.

“Beyond that no one has asked me to sponsor them”

“Two weeks? SHAME ON YOU!“ Cliff said. He then sent me down to the Salvation Army in Hyannis to do some prospecting.

I found a guy right away, we took the first three steps that afternoon. I went to sleep that night as emotionally, mentally and spiritually healthy as could be.

Why can’t a similar ennui afflict an entire AA group – and why can’t the solution for ANY such malaise be the same for all as it is for one person ? I am certain it can be.

Isn’t our solution as common to each of us and is our problem? A group is a collection of individual members is it not? Might not the overall health of a group and it’s growth or lack thereof be a direct reflection of the spiritual condition and growth factor – only in the aggregate?

How many of your members are right now, actively sponsoring another alcoholic through the steps? I don’t mean taking him to the study – I mean taking him to God!

How many are sitting around waiting for two or three guys to “finish writing 4th steps” and not doing shit otherwise? Going around on speaking commitments or passing out flyers, yada yada – to “Plug” the group and then waiting to see who shows up rarely works in my experience.

What works is one member out there working one-on-one with another alcoholic and dragging that cat in from the cold alley.

If each member would be attending OTHER meetings looking for prospects AND they are spiritually fit, I believe that God will send puking desperate alcoholics to them. And of course ethos new prospects will also be brought into the study IN ADDITION to taking the steps with heir new sponsor/members.

Groups that isolate can become ill – much like a house that remains sealed during cold and flu season. Open up the windows and let some air an light in to reduce infections!
Fresh blood will come into a group one drunk at a time. No ads to buy. No flyers to handout. Just the results of one drunk talking to another – not two or three talking to fifty.

Get your members off their asses and out in to he field where they belong. Then when they come back on study night, just listen to the buzz in that room! And maybe, MAYBE a new face or two brought in to find his truth and the solution.

Going through this and STILL no growth – after an extended periods of time – then that’s His will before ours, sorry.

Keep your noses in the Book but get your asses out in the field! Don’t make me come down there!

Of course you can always just hold raffles and AA picnics – maybe even serve hotdogs and pizza on meeting night. Lots of middle-of-road- solutions based groups think that’s a good way to raise attendance. But I think it might be more efficient to just hand out the guns.

Peace,

Danny S
http://recoveredalcoholic.blogspot.com/

Group Stagnation

I was “conversing” with one of my friends down in Queensland, Australia involved in the Fellowship and we went back and forth with some ideas on growing a Primary Purpose Group once the group has been going a while (It’s spreading!) and some of the hurdles we encounter along the way.

Since I just got back from FOTS in Boston to find that out little cave on the Peninsula of Doom needs some TLC due to the high winds while I was gone; I thought I would take a day off and just share that communication with you – since this would apply to ANY group, not just a “Primary Purpose” format group. I’ll be trying to put the house back together most of today.

***********************************************************************************
Sorry for the delayed response. I just have LOTS of stuff to do – but you have been on my mind. I am finally sitting down to offer a reply. Don’t know if I’ll be on target or not but maybe look at the focus of your group activities. Is it to study the Big Book (just one part of helping alcoholics) or is it the whole kit and caboodle of “Primary Purpose”.

Even groups that gather solely to study yet have less trench activity than they should, might want to incorporate more Twelve Stepping for individuals into their “system”.

Maybe that’s your situation. I think it’s common. One day a year or two ago I was feeling like crap for several days and didn’t know why. I called Cliff B in Dallas up and told him about it.

He said, “When was the last time you sat down with a new guy to do the work?”

“I just heard a fifth step two weeks ago, Cliff . . . . and I have an appointment to start with a new prospect this coming Monday.“ I said.

“Beyond that no one has asked me to sponsor them”

“Two weeks? SHAME ON YOU!“ Cliff said. He then sent me down to the Salvation Army in Hyannis to do some prospecting.

I found a guy right away, we took the first three steps that afternoon. I went to sleep that night as emotionally, mentally and spiritually healthy as could be.

Why can’t a similar ennui afflict an entire AA group – and why can’t the solution for ANY such malaise be the same for all as it is for one person ? I am certain it can be.

Isn’t our solution as common to each of us and is our problem? A group is a collection of individual members is it not? Might not the overall health of a group and it’s growth or lack thereof be a direct reflection of the spiritual condition and growth factor – only in the aggregate?

How many of your members are right now, actively sponsoring another alcoholic through the steps? I don’t mean taking him to the study – I mean taking him to God!

How many are sitting around waiting for two or three guys to “finish writing 4th steps” and not doing shit otherwise? Going around on speaking commitments or passing out flyers, yada yada – to “Plug” the group and then waiting to see who shows up rarely works in my experience.

What works is one member out there working one-on-one with another alcoholic and dragging that cat in from the cold alley.

If each member would be attending OTHER meetings looking for prospects AND they are spiritually fit, I believe that God will send puking desperate alcoholics to them. And of course ethos new prospects will also be brought into the study IN ADDITION to taking the steps with heir new sponsor/members.

Groups that isolate can become ill – much like a house that remains sealed during cold and flu season. Open up the windows and let some air an light in to reduce infections!
Fresh blood will come into a group one drunk at a time. No ads to buy. No flyers to handout. Just the results of one drunk talking to another – not two or three talking to fifty.

Get your members off their asses and out in to he field where they belong. Then when they come back on study night, just listen to the buzz in that room! And maybe, MAYBE a new face or two brought in to find his truth and the solution.

Going through this and STILL no growth – after an extended periods of time – then that’s His will before ours, sorry.

Keep your noses in the Book but get your asses out in the field! Don’t make me come down there!

Of course you can always just hold raffles and AA picnics – maybe even serve hotdogs and pizza on meeting night. Lots of middle-of-road- solutions based groups think that’s a good way to raise attendance. But I think it might be more efficient to just hand out the guns.

Peace,

Danny S
http://recoveredalcoholic.blogspot.com/

Question: Describe "Alcoholic"

Time’s up. Pencils down!

Have you ever heard someone say that they “ALWAYS KNEW” they were alcoholic. I’m sure you have. You may have said it yourself at times. I know I have – sorry to say.

Then how come if I ask what an alcoholic is, I can’t get an answer that’s even CLOSE to what my Big Book clearly tells me? How can that be? Keep in mind now that these are folks attending AA meetings and who are trying to fit in an be members – benefiting from the AA experience.

They can tell us about all the grief that drinking has caused them. They can give a freakin‘ drunkologue that will have you weeping into your cocoa puffs and balling through the night

But to give an actual definition, or better yet – give “Our description of the alcoholic” – they can’t do it.

So how do they know if they are alcoholic or not – and if AA is for them? They don’t.

Some coming to meetings for double digit years – getting their buck-an-hour group rap sessions without ever qualifying – thinking they are members – not passing on the “THIS” message – not giving away the common solution to real alcoholics – telling them things that THEY do to stay sober – that will KILL the real alkie. What a disgrace.

My friend Mickey Bush, an alcoholic if ever there was one (and an addict too) - says he’s got two parrots, Bill & Bob. He’s taught them to say “I’m an alcoholic.. . . I’m an alcoholic” - but are they alcoholic just because they SAY SO? (Please don’t confuse AA membership with diagnosis. No one is an alcoholic just because they SAY SO.)

Well, if I stand in the middle of a used car lot – does that make me a Buick? If I go down the street here on The Peninsula of Doom and jump into Vineyard Bay – and swim across it to Martha’s Vineyard = does that make me a Striped Bass?

No, what is likely to have happened is that they . . (Not the parrots) . . walked into an AA meeting and some arrogant ass said to him the same thing that was said to me. It was something like “No one gets here by accident. If you are here you are an alcoholic”.

Or maybe . . .

“It’s Friday night and your in a church basement with us. You MUST be an alcoholic.”

WHOA! Wait just a cotton pickin‘ minute there guy. What ever happened to “We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic, but you can quickly diagnose yourself.” (31:3) See link

What will you will be told about these beautiful words from our Big Book? You will told that you are too STUPID to diagnose yourself. Of course it may not be said in those words. It may be couched in something like, “Your best thinking got you into your current mess so you can’ t trust your thinking” – but this is the stuff we hear all the time in AA.

Ok. But you can trust someone who doesn’t even know what “Our description of the alcoholic” is? – - who hasn’t learned for themselves the distinction between and alcoholic and a non-alcoholic? – - who thinks that anyone who drinks too much – too often, automatically is alcoholic and therefor qualifies for membership in AA?

You may be told that your brain is still “In the fog”, or some other such condescending tripe. Meanwhile, the Big Books historical accounts, ALL of which are about twelve stepping by the way, show case after case of still shakin’ and bakin’ alcoholics being taught to do just that – learn to make the distinction between the alcoholic and the non-alcoholic and see if they identify.

“In the preceding chapters you have learned something of alcoholism. We hope we have made clear the distinction between the alcoholic and the nonalcoholic.” (44:0)

It is the ONLY way to concede to ones innermost self your condition – being TOLD you are alcoholic is NOT.

Wouldn’t it nice if when someone comes up to another says he doesn’t know whether or not he’s an alcoholic, if you they don’t know, they might want to set the ego aside and say something meaningful and helpful – like “I don’t know.”

Then they could be sent someone else in the home group who knows what they heck he’s talking about. It may save a life, instead of kill someone. Or send him to me – I do know as was passed onto me. I do not make the aforementioned “proclamation” – but I sure as hell will show that person, in AA’s Big Book where the diagnosis is – so he can LEARN whether or not he qualifies. Then if I am satisfied – by hearing his story, supported with his new found knowledge – that he is “One of us” (Not one of “me” of “US”) then I can take the time to show him the solution we have found.

I want to make sure he’s the real deal because as far as I know no one has EVER recovered from alcoholism who didn’t actually HAVE alcoholism – and if I waste time with someone who cannot recover from a malady they do not have – I may deprive another truly suffering individual from what we have to offer.

Yes it is an exclusive club – for alcoholics only! Not hard drinkers, not lonely hearts, not cheap bastards whose insurance has run out for out-patient therapy, not drug addicts, not over eaters – JUST ALCOHOLICS – those who suffer from alcoholism – by “Our description” – Not yours, not mine, not Oprahs, not Dr, Phils, not your family doctors, not your “addictions counselors” – just “OURS”.

As Tradition States: ” Our membership ought to include all who suffer from alcoholism. Hence we may refuse none who wish to recover. “ If you do not suffer from alcoholism or if you don’t want to recover – sorry, but bye bye . Let’s go fishing sometime – and we’ll talk about your food addiction – but right now I haven’t time to spare for it.

Someone else is dying from untreated alcoholism and the teaching and practicing the twelve steps for the benefit of the alcoholic – so he can RECOVER – is the SOLE purpose of the AA group and my primary purpose.

Peace,

Danny S

http://recoveredalcoholic.blogspot.com

Is Sobriety a Gift?

Of course it is. But how does it come? If it’s a GIFT then how come the Big Book has all that “work” to do? Aren’t gifts FREE? Isn’t it “FREELY GIVEN”?

No, “Freely give” is what PEOPLE do when passing it on. God requires WORK for His spiritual experience! The “gift” of which is spoken, sobriety, is not the result of the Steps. (By the way, the word “gift” does not appear in this context in the Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous even once)

Spiritual awakening or experience IS the only result we seek by taking the steps. Seeking sobriety is usually a selfish motive – and the Program is not a selfish program – it is a Program of selfLESSNESS. The only result we seek in taking the steps IS the spiritual experience so we can be of maximum service to God and our Fellows. Sobriety in incidental.

“Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.”

We have to be careful because some people use all sorts of weird re-invented methods of taking the steps (Under their self hewn banner of “flexibility” without using the clear-cut directions and therefore do not reach the spiritual awakening – then drink. They wonder what happened. They often had been “taking the steps” with a goal of solving their drink problem and NOT to have the spiritual awakening. Then they go away saying, “AA doesn’t work”.)

Or even worse – they decide that the spiritual awakening must take YEARS to reach so they must therefor be “STILL RECOVERING” because they are “Going to meetings” to treat their illness.

My wife Nancy -born in Brooklyn raised in da Bronx – makes a genuine New York Style cheesecake. it is nothing like that swwet vanilla flavored foam-crap you guys eat in Jersey Diners and Midwestern steakhouses – that is billed as “NY style cheesecake”. YUCH!

The recipe is quite simple. If you like her cheesecake and she gives you the recipe and you follow it – you will get exactly the same cheesecake. But if you decide – “Well I don’t need all that sugar so I’ll cut it down a scosh — and I can’t afford that good cream cheese so I’ll use half the amount and fill in with some yogurt – - you’ll get some kind “cheesecake”. But you will also NOT get the same result that Nancy gets – and you will likely be disappointed when it comes out differently. You may in fact not get a real cheesecake at all but some facsimile. It may even taste lousy!

And guess what.If you pass that crappy recipe onto someone else calling it cheesecake – they will also end up with crap.

It is my experience that since I have followed PRECISELY the same set of a few simple rules (The twelve steps) I DO have PRECISELY what was promised: recovery from alcoholism. I am no longer powerless over alcohol – I have been given a NEW POWER over it – and I have no desire for any facsimile thereof. It tastes too wonderful.

When we do what the co-authors of the Big Book did – we get what they got. This is the experience of millions I understand – and in my own universe I witness daily the exact same miracle among the many men with whom I carry this message.

Not MY message. Not some old geezer in the back row’ s message who hasn’t had a drink in thirty years and is mad as a freakin’ hatter – but THIS message.

These protegees I have been blessed to have met work with others too. And then THEY recover.

With only a mere decade of AA membership and eight years of contented, continuous sobriety -

(Not impressive to some I am sure – since they seem to place so much importance on how long someone is sober rather than whether or not they have had the promise of a spiritual awakening and can transmit the “THIS” message of AA.)

– I have been blessed to have created a fellowship of the spirit around me that I crave. I am a “Grand-sponsor” many times over and it continues to grow. That ain’t to brag. That’s just something I like to point out to prove that the original recipe produces the precise same results – miracles – over and over and over. Just like the same recipe for cheesecake can be repeated over and over and over.

These men “Have been given the power to help others”<!– and it is such an unbelievable joy to witness and to be a part of. AA is not about “My sobriety” anymore. It all about being of service. I’m alreeady sober by the grace of God (spirituality) not by the Steps of the BB. The BB brought me to Him – THEN He gifts me sobriety and a whole lot more.

But change the recipe (The few simple rules of the 12 steps) and the resulting product – well frankly, oftentimes looks like Star Trek transporter accident.

I have a question for you: How many people have you sat down with, say in the past month, or EVER, to take them through the twelve steps – as per the co-authors of the Big Book?

Do you believe in HOW IT WORKS from an intellectual decision on your part – or have you seen first hand that what they SAY they does actually work?”

See if you base your view on your intellectual OPINION or real-life EXPERIENCE. Which is it? I believe this is a very fair question.

Peace,

Danny S

Mamaluke! Have You Done Your Chores Today?

Hey! What do you gotta do?

Let me tell you something. For years going to AA meetings was a chore for me. It was one of the thing I “HAD TO DO” like putting down the toilet seat in my house, taking out the trash, shaving, shopping, going to work, making sangweeches for my kids lunch. If I didn’t do any of these things then my life became unmanageable. (If you are married then you’ll agree with ALL of these.)

My fellowship goombas told me that “Lot’s of meetings” was one of the things I had to do to stay sober – for if I did not remain sober I could not enjoy life much. There was even the pressure of being clocked by others in meetings and by implied sober seniority “rules”

But when this “Design for living” (15:2 – 28:2 – 81:3) called “the Twelve Steps” actually becomes the LIVING part of our existence, then it’s all just one big ball of happiness, joy and wonderful, new freedom!!

When life becomes “Something I do in-between meetings” separating the AA Program from life – then both life AND meetings become chores. Why anyone would think that’s a good way to live – I just don’t know.

And that’s your DIRTY LITTLE AA SECRET! I know – don’t bullshit me pal! You are BORED in AA MEETINGS. They make you stoonad – you know it’s true.

So here’s the solution! I swear it is!

I get most of my guys right now from meetings – not all – but most. I get there early – I stay late. I circulate. I advertise. Prospecting IS promotion AND attraction. I leave the old misquoted sound byte for Tradition Eleven (Attraction not promotion) where it originates and belongs. (See: Can I Come Over?)

I let people know I am an active sponsor and always available. I hand out my little prospecting cards which tell folks I am available for work. I keep my eye out on the crowd and pretty much try not to groan out loud listening to the speaker. HA!

Yes, Joe and Jane middle-of-the-road solutions based AAers – you AND your sad-sack drunkologue is one big fucking bore to real alcoholics! They may excite non-alcoholics like those who thought James Frey’s story was “inspiring” – but not real McCoys. (see: Boring)

Sometime people come to meetings specifically looking for me. Sometimes I have to chase them down a bit. Someone like Cliff B may have to yell at me and tell me to get my ass down to the local Sally if find myself in a dry spell. And hurtin’

But I am always “WITH CHILD” when it comes to drunks with whom to work. THANK GOD!

AA as a Fellowship is not boring when I am using it as it was designed – as a society and supportive means of upholding our PRIMARY PURPOSE.

And if you are unable to do this, because you don’t work with others, or aren’t’ qualified to sponsor others because you haven’t recovered – then what the hell are you doing in AA meetings anyway? Drinking our coffee? Trying to screw our gals? Searching for a Goumada? Pleasing the spouse, the hardon with a suitcase, the boss or the courts?

Fine –then suffer!

As life throws its curves and bumps in front of me, there is no longer the urge to “Get to a meeting” to settle myself. I no longer get “Squirreley” if I miss a few days, or even a week of meetings. As far as I know, no one regularly characterizes me as a “serene” man. But certainly I do KNOW serenity, which is one of the hundreds of promises made to me by the authors or the Big Book provided I take other simple steps. (And in the case of “knowing serenity” – made my amends.)

If the lack of a meeting began to once again affect my serenity then I’d have to take a real serious look at my spiritual condition. Being dependent upon meetings to keep my head on straight doesn’t sound like very much freedom to me.

The joy in carrying our Primary Purpose into the Home group is the CURE for all meeting malaise. It works. I assure you. You won’t be watching the clock. You wont’ be staring at the pink thong sticking out of the jeans in the folding chair in front of you. (Well, maybe someday – after you walk on water), and you wont be making the mad dash through the parking lot to get to your car so you don’t miss The Sopranos. You may actually be useful!

Going to meetings to stay sober or so you don’t get mooshadda for another freakin‘ day is totally stoonad. It SUCKS EGGS! Going to meetings to be useful and to find another alcoholic to bring to God is a wonderful existence full of purpose and joy – not a chore.

Peace,

Danny S

Terror on The Penninsula of Doom

“Many of us have been so touchy that even casual reference to spiritual things made us bristle with antagonism. This sort of thinking had to beandoned.” (48:0)

Here on the Peninsula of Doom, Cape Cod, the “Bristling” with “Antagonism” at the mere casual mention of God in a meeting is sometime matched with direct implications of “Hey don’t listen to that God stuff. Just don’t drink, come hang with us in meetings and everything will be alright” and “Groups don’t drink, but people do” – and other phrases useless to the real alcoholic.

I mean, if that were true then the meeting makers would be making it – and we see that meeting makers relapse ALL THE TIME – even ones who go to two, three or four meetings a day. MAN! Can you imagine being so meeting reliant for sobriety? It’s no wonder so many newcomers get burned out and give up on AA.

This idea is further supported with their own experience “That’s all I did. My sponsor was GREAT because he never pushed that God stuff on me – and now I am great because I am not like that last guy who just shared – who mentioned God.”

Are these people lying? Probably not. I believe them. It’s their experience. Who am I to question it? If they say that If their will was sufficient to solve the drink problem, I believe it.

But I also know from experience supported by the experiences of the first 100 alcoholic co-founders – and clearly documented in “Alcoholics Anonymous” that anyone who can stop drinking or moderate without God – ALREADY HAS POWER over alcohol and isn’t “One of us”.

“WE” are powerless – and just because someone else exhibits power over alcohol – can utilize the human-aid of meetings and “Hanging in the middle of the pack” or “Putting the plug in the jug” - does not mean that everyone can do it – and how arrogant is it to tell others that THEY CAN! Some of us are truly powerless even if they are not.

Do you thing Ebby (See He Got Off His Ass) held back on the “God talk” because he was afraid to scare Bill W. off? Hell, no. That’s not the way it started and not the way it was done back then – when AA had a seventy-five percent success rate. Ebby even went further than that with Bill W when he said, “I’ve got religion!” – and STILL Bill managed to recover. Why? Because there is this little escape hatch for the religiously “Allergic”. It is called “God of YOUR OWN understanding”.

We don’t have to accept anyone else’s concept of God, as long as it IS GOD. My Big Book tells me that any human concept of God will be insufficient anyway – so why get bogged down on that? We don’t. And when I follow the directions in the Book – I LEARN that!

This may not be prevalent where you are located, but here on Cape Cod, it is. (I don’t want to say the entire Cape – I mostly attend meetings “Mid-cape” in the Hyannis area.) There are small crews of folks, men mostly, who seem to have made it their mission to contradict those whose recovery experience has been spiritual and in step with a God of their own understanding.

According to my Big Book – NOT solely my opinion – these people are probably not really alcoholic. If they are, MAN they must be miserable. (They even look miserable too – rarely smile, always seem depressed, and just have no life-energy about them. No twinkle in the eye that we hear about.)

No wonder these folks eschew the Big Book. They are TERRIFIED of it! Learning from it might show them the truth – they ARE in the WRONG PLACE!

What business is it of mine? Well, I nearly died listening to it. That’s all. Just death – leaving a fatherless family behind with my head blown off by my Winchester. No big deal. (See “Nearly Lost My Head)

I can’t change them – and I don’t even try – I can at least be aware of it – because it helps me de-program newcomers who have to hear it and then hear something totally different from me.

GOD CRAMMING

Peace,

Danny S

Primary Purpose

Why study the Big Book? I can tell you why I do. My aim is to study the Big Book so I can be better armed when pursuing my avocation which is to help other alcoholics achieve sobriety.

While taking these steps toward a spiritual experience I discovered the “punch line” of this AA thing

– my real purpose which is to

“fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us.”

– where previously I thought this whole thing was solely about “Not drinking”.
Sure, I wanted to get my life in order and start to enjoy the benefits of sobriety, who wouldn’t? There’ s more money, better relationships, no hangovers – just a whole myriad of phyical miseries and emotional stresses can be abated when alcohol is removed.

But ultimately this was self-seeking and selfish and being so self-centeredness would take us right back to the root of the problem. We might not escape our old inclinations toward hurting others as we gratified ourselves until we took on attitude of altruistic usefulness to others – our Creator and our fellow man.

While it is true that we had a spiritual awakening and were staying sober we also had to help others achieve the same – by passing on that which was freely passed on to us. That of course brings us into “Primary Purpose”.

We might as well get as good as we can at it. (Being of “maximum” service)

We need to be armed with the facts about ourselves, which we learn from the book. After all, if we don’t see ourselves in the book, then we can’t very well be alcoholic can we?

So this means I study the text in the book “Alcoholics Anonymous” so I can apply it and pass it on the common solution to those who share our common problem.

So ask yourself, if you like to study the Big Book . . .why? (An especially good question if you have been attending BBSS meetings for a good lenght of time and STILL have no one to sponsor. What the hell are you there for?)

And if you DON’T like to study the Big Book . . . why? Two fair questions.

Peace,

Danny S