Question: Describe "Alcoholic"

Time’s up. Pencils down!

Have you ever heard someone say that they “ALWAYS KNEW” they were alcoholic. I’m sure you have. You may have said it yourself at times. I know I have – sorry to say.

Then how come if I ask what an alcoholic is, I can’t get an answer that’s even CLOSE to what my Big Book clearly tells me? How can that be? Keep in mind now that these are folks attending AA meetings and who are trying to fit in an be members – benefiting from the AA experience.

They can tell us about all the grief that drinking has caused them. They can give a freakin‘ drunkologue that will have you weeping into your cocoa puffs and balling through the night

But to give an actual definition, or better yet – give “Our description of the alcoholic” – they can’t do it.

So how do they know if they are alcoholic or not – and if AA is for them? They don’t.

Some coming to meetings for double digit years – getting their buck-an-hour group rap sessions without ever qualifying – thinking they are members – not passing on the “THIS” message – not giving away the common solution to real alcoholics – telling them things that THEY do to stay sober – that will KILL the real alkie. What a disgrace.

My friend Mickey Bush, an alcoholic if ever there was one (and an addict too) - says he’s got two parrots, Bill & Bob. He’s taught them to say “I’m an alcoholic.. . . I’m an alcoholic” - but are they alcoholic just because they SAY SO? (Please don’t confuse AA membership with diagnosis. No one is an alcoholic just because they SAY SO.)

Well, if I stand in the middle of a used car lot – does that make me a Buick? If I go down the street here on The Peninsula of Doom and jump into Vineyard Bay – and swim across it to Martha’s Vineyard = does that make me a Striped Bass?

No, what is likely to have happened is that they . . (Not the parrots) . . walked into an AA meeting and some arrogant ass said to him the same thing that was said to me. It was something like “No one gets here by accident. If you are here you are an alcoholic”.

Or maybe . . .

“It’s Friday night and your in a church basement with us. You MUST be an alcoholic.”

WHOA! Wait just a cotton pickin‘ minute there guy. What ever happened to “We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic, but you can quickly diagnose yourself.” (31:3) See link

What will you will be told about these beautiful words from our Big Book? You will told that you are too STUPID to diagnose yourself. Of course it may not be said in those words. It may be couched in something like, “Your best thinking got you into your current mess so you can’ t trust your thinking” – but this is the stuff we hear all the time in AA.

Ok. But you can trust someone who doesn’t even know what “Our description of the alcoholic” is? – - who hasn’t learned for themselves the distinction between and alcoholic and a non-alcoholic? – - who thinks that anyone who drinks too much – too often, automatically is alcoholic and therefor qualifies for membership in AA?

You may be told that your brain is still “In the fog”, or some other such condescending tripe. Meanwhile, the Big Books historical accounts, ALL of which are about twelve stepping by the way, show case after case of still shakin’ and bakin’ alcoholics being taught to do just that – learn to make the distinction between the alcoholic and the non-alcoholic and see if they identify.

“In the preceding chapters you have learned something of alcoholism. We hope we have made clear the distinction between the alcoholic and the nonalcoholic.” (44:0)

It is the ONLY way to concede to ones innermost self your condition – being TOLD you are alcoholic is NOT.

Wouldn’t it nice if when someone comes up to another says he doesn’t know whether or not he’s an alcoholic, if you they don’t know, they might want to set the ego aside and say something meaningful and helpful – like “I don’t know.”

Then they could be sent someone else in the home group who knows what they heck he’s talking about. It may save a life, instead of kill someone. Or send him to me – I do know as was passed onto me. I do not make the aforementioned “proclamation” – but I sure as hell will show that person, in AA’s Big Book where the diagnosis is – so he can LEARN whether or not he qualifies. Then if I am satisfied – by hearing his story, supported with his new found knowledge – that he is “One of us” (Not one of “me” of “US”) then I can take the time to show him the solution we have found.

I want to make sure he’s the real deal because as far as I know no one has EVER recovered from alcoholism who didn’t actually HAVE alcoholism – and if I waste time with someone who cannot recover from a malady they do not have – I may deprive another truly suffering individual from what we have to offer.

Yes it is an exclusive club – for alcoholics only! Not hard drinkers, not lonely hearts, not cheap bastards whose insurance has run out for out-patient therapy, not drug addicts, not over eaters – JUST ALCOHOLICS – those who suffer from alcoholism – by “Our description” – Not yours, not mine, not Oprahs, not Dr, Phils, not your family doctors, not your “addictions counselors” – just “OURS”.

As Tradition States: ” Our membership ought to include all who suffer from alcoholism. Hence we may refuse none who wish to recover. “ If you do not suffer from alcoholism or if you don’t want to recover – sorry, but bye bye . Let’s go fishing sometime – and we’ll talk about your food addiction – but right now I haven’t time to spare for it.

Someone else is dying from untreated alcoholism and the teaching and practicing the twelve steps for the benefit of the alcoholic – so he can RECOVER – is the SOLE purpose of the AA group and my primary purpose.

Peace,

Danny S

http://recoveredalcoholic.blogspot.com