The Right and the Means of Distinction
Are you or are you NOT an alcoholic?
So how come “no right to s
ay” only applies to the ‘sayin’ when it is what THEY want to hear? Why is it perfectly OK pronounce anyone at all as alcoholic without knowing a thing about them except that they have “shown up” while at the same time it is NOT ok to admit a dissatisfaction with ones qualification as alcoholic? The truth is it is fine to discern either. Refusing or intentionally remaining unable to distinguish the alcoholic from the nonalcoholic and yet think that it is just fine to pronou nce some as “ALCOHOLIC” is what hypocrites do. Unlearned-ed, ignorant and arrogant hypocrites. Does “We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic,“ automatically mean that we also must not like to pronounce any individual as non-alcoholic? It doesn’t say that does it?
I’m just sayin’, man. Chill ok?
But never mind that . . . . . the truth is that non- alcoholics can never become members of AA – even if they say so – even if I say so – even if your sponsor says so – if someone on face book says so or even the old fart with the red nose and the white hair crouching and pretending to be “wise” and that “twinkle” in the eye actually being macular degeneration from twenty years of over-ogling young newcomer girls with thongs pulled-up-too-high over their lower lumbar ‘stamps’ – from the back of the church basement, says so – even if they have a desire to stop drinking or whatever their desires are.
We can twist the short-form of the Traditions all we want to make us think so -so we can be helpful to EVERYONE – but the long-form sets us straight without the need for stretching. And this is for the protection of the fellowship. The idea that non-alcoholics can become members of AA is also well debunked in virtually all subsequent written commentary coming from the co-founders on the subject. The idea a person can be considered a member of AA “when he says so” – is a privilege reserved for those who suffer from alcoholics only. ALCOHOLICS who fit “our description of the alcoholic” – not ‘anyone’s description of the alcoholic’. AA is a very exclusive fellowship. Like it or not.
Treatment Center indoctrination is difficult to navigate around. Treacherous. Today’s “Addictions” ‘experts’ – drug and alcohol counselors have become sophisticated in their hypnotic influences over hurting people and have become very good at tricking the weak while they are down. They have been very successful at establishing their undeserved ‘certifications’ and abject ignorance about alcoholism and convincing drug addicts and heavy drinkers that they can walk out of the center and become AA members full well ignoring that this is a lie- — that relapse after relapse can keep the cycle going as long as they are intentionally instructed to declare themselves “members” in a fellowship for which their can not qualify — and in which they probably will not get well.
Unfortunately then this rehabology doctrine leaches like DTT into our church basements and weakens our ability to keep Primary Purpose going.
Anyone who has been led to believe that ANYONE – even a non-alcoholic desiring to stop drinking can become a member of AA just hasn’t performed enough independent inquiry into the subject and is relying on heresy and uninformed opinions of others who have agenda (financial mostly) to push into the fellowship.
After you’ve buried a few non-alcoholics who die from another problem because EGO said “I CAN TAKE HIM THROUGH THE STEPS ANYWAY” and told him it was fine to call himself “alcoholic” and “member” even after not being satisfied that he was one (92:1) then you begin to see the importance of why all this is so and understand it deeply. You also understand other folk’s refusals to see it. Why they are unable to grasp the horrible truth that might actually apply to themselves – that maybe they themselves have been in the wrong place all along too.
The hardest words to day in any language are these: “I am wrong”
Anyone – non-alcoholics, alcoholic it does not matter – who isn’t working with others and helping them recover through the 12 steps – never get far enough into the trenches to grasp the concept so they must rely on opinions.
Who agrees with what the co-authors told us, right in the book about those first 43 pages in that book, “In the preceding chapters you have learned something of alcoholism. We hope we have made clear the distinction between the alcoholic and the nonalcoholic.” (44:0)
How good of an idea might it be – when sponsoring a new person – upon arriving at this page to turn it into yes or no answer affair?
1) Have you learned something of alcoholism from the preceding chapters? Y/N
2) Can you make the distinction between the alcoholic and the non alcoholic? Y/N
If the answer is “I don’t have the right” then we are done. There is no point in proceeding. The co-authors provide us with the means AND the right.
IF the answers are not YES and YES then we haven’t accomplished what the co-authors intended to be accomplished. We haven’t taken step one. For if we don’t know what an alcoholic is – how to tell if one is or isn’t alcoholic – then how on earth can we know whether or not we are ONE? Why would we want to try to belong to a fellowship that we do not even need to solve our problem or qualify for membership in? We can’t admit powerless over alcohol if we don’t know what the hell that means!
If they cannot make the distinction between the alcoholic and the non-alcoholic then they haven’t learned about alcoholism and anyone who cannot or will not do this has NOT taken Step one – even if they THINK they have.
If you haven’t learned about alcoholism hopefully you’ll ask questions and not proffer in meetings answers to questions you do not know anything about. By this reason opinions are not healthy in this recovery racket – not when they are represented as facts and knowledge when they are not.
Peace and Love and GO Siobhan!
Danny S – RLRA
Real Live Recovered Alcoholic
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Danny,
I want to thank you. Its been quite a journey, love the content on both your websites. I also wanted to let you know, you may want to upload tom pick’s audio on your personal website, it just doesn’t play.
While keeping up with this excellent body of work, your comment about a “well” sounding newcomer resonated with me. It reminded me of my first try, where I got 4 years of not drinking and going to meetings before thankfully relapsing. I say thankful because it led me to really question what was happening at our friendly local AA groups.
Nowhere is this better illustrated than the following blog put up by a newcomer to “share” wisdom.
Here she offers his opinion on how to pick a sponsor, mind you he has yet to work a step:
http://www.thewebprophet.net/12steps1god/?p=159
I really do not know what to say about this entry, well I dont really know about any of the posts for that matter:
http://www.thewebprophet.net/12steps1god/?p=206
This is a description of a meeting that she attended:
http://www.thewebprophet.net/12steps1god/?p=377
From what I can glean, she is in Dallas, and it does not make it too hard to figure out which meeting she is talking about.
And now Danny, here is the chilling sobering fact, I paid attention to the blog stats and this is what I found. The number of her posts steadily decreased as she approaches ninety days….slowly petering out to nil. The last post was 8 months ago.
Yet another example of pop AA bullshale.
Keep up the great work.
Zak S
Recovered Drunk
Gift of Sobriety
Irving, Tx
Thanks for the good word Zak, really. Interesting site that one. I read her post and decided to send off a good word to her. Here is what I gave her. thanks for the good words yourself. PEACE brother!
_____________________________________________________________________________
It sounds like you found the answer to the problem you had with the Dallas Primary Purpose Group yourself — when you said, “If you go to an AA meeting and don’t “feel right” for some reason, try another group in your area. Meetings are not the program of recovery.”
May you DO have a problem you can “share” your way out of and there are ‘shareathon’ recovery gatherings ALL OVER Dallas – I have been there. I am not a member of that group but I have close ties and friendships with some of its members and let me tell you something that you might consider: You are one one of THOUSANDS who came to a group LIKE THAT ONE and left because what they saw did not ‘appeal’ to them. It wasn’t what they were ‘used to’. It didn’t feel like the warm and tingly “Group” sessions in rehab. That’s what they were looking for – a warm fuzzy feeling of familiarity. (Appeasement and butt kissing, really but I won’t go there now) But here is the kicker; if you ever got desperate enough to go back to the PPG in Dallas I know that you would be welcomed with arms WIDE OPENED! That is cooler than cool! God bless you and if I can ever be of assistance please look me up. Or if you need help go see those folks down there at the Primary Purpose Group of Dallas. You will find someone there who has, “recovered, and has been given the power to help” you. If you need it, that is. Don’t turn down true love when it can be yours honey.
Peace & Love
Danny S – RLRA
Real Live Recovered Alcoholic
http://recoveredalcoholic.blogspot.com